Not really myself, but, damn near close.

I was working in a customers house when suddenly I felt the urge to shit. Normally I can control such urges, but this time it was really painful. I obviously couldn't do it in the customers house so I went out to my work van.
I didn't have a toilet in my van obviously, but I did have a plastic bag. So I jumped in the back and dropped my drawers, trying to aim my backside at the plastic bag I had laid out on the floor.

Worst case scenario happened. I shit all over my work van. It was a bad situation. Even worse, I had nothing to clean up with. So I used my underwear. I quickly cleaned up and went in to finish with the customer, hoping that I didn't smell like shit the whole time.


Now I know what is up when I see people's underwear on the side of the road!

signed
Shit-for-brains in Seattle